A young boy goes off to college, but about
1/3 way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered what money his parents gave him.
"Hmmmm," he wonders, "How am I gonna get more dough?"
Then he gets an idea. He calls his father.
"Dad," he says, "You won't believe the wonders that modern education are
coming up with! Why, they actually have a program here that will teach Fido how to
talk!"
"That's absolutely amazing!" his
father says. "How do I get him in that program?"
"Just send him down here with
$1000," the boy says, "I'll get him into the course."
So, his father sends the dog and the $1000.
About 2/3 way through the semester, the money runs out. The boy calls his father again.
"So how's Fido doing, son?" his
father asks.
"Awesome, dad, he's talking up a
storm," he says, "but you just won't believe this - they've had such good
results with this program, that they've implemented a new one to teach the animals to
READ!"
"READ!?" says his father,
"No kidding! What do I have to do to get him in that program?"
"Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the
class."
So his father sends the money. At the end
of the semester, the boy has a problem. When he gets home, his father will find out that
the dog can neither talk nor read. So he shoots the dog.
When he gets home, his father is all
excited.
"Where's Fido? I just can't wait to
hear him talk and listen to him read something!"
"Dad," the boy says, "I have
some grim news. This morning when I got out of the shower, Fido was in the living room
kicking back in the recliner, reading the morning paper, like he usually does. Then he
turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messin' around with that little redhead
who lives on Oak Street?' "
The father says, "Oh, shit! I hope you
SHOT that lyin' son of a bitch!"
