* PCMCIA -People Can't Memorize Computer
Industry Acronyms
* ISDN - It Still Does Nothing
* SCSI - System Can't See It
* DOS - Defective Operating System
* BASIC - Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control
* IBM - I Blame Microsoft
* DEC - Do Expect Cuts
* CD-ROM - Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
* OS/2 - Obsolete Soon, Too.
* WWW - World Wide Wait
* MACINTOSH - Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs
* PENTIUM - Produces Erroneous Numbers Thru Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics
* COBOL - Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
* AMIGA - A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction
* LISP - Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis
* MIPS - Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed
* WINDOWS - Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
* MICROSOFT - Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers
*RISC - Reduced Into Silly Code
And more....
* BIT - A word used to describe computers,
as in "Our son's computer cost quite a bit."
* BOOT - What your friends give you because you spend too much time bragging about your
computer skills.
* BUG - What your eyes do after you stare at the tiny green computer screen for more than
15 minutes. Also: what computer magazine companies do to you after they get your name on
their mailing list.
* CHIPS - The fattening, non-nutritional food computer users eat to avoid having to leave
their keyboards for meals.
* COPY - What you have to do during school tests because you spend too much time at the
computer and not enough time studying.
* CURSOR - What you turn into when you can't get your computer to perform, as in "You
$#% computer!"
* DISK - What goes out in your back after bending over a computer keyboard for seven hours
at a clip.
* DUMP - The place all your former hobbies wind up soon after you install your computer.
* ERROR - What you made the first time you walked into a computer showroom to "just
look."
* EXPANSION UNIT - The new room you have to build on to your home to house your computer
and all its peripherals.
* FILE - What your secretary can now do to her nails six and a half hours a day, now that
the computer does her day's work in 30 minutes.
* FLOPPY - The condition of a constant computer user's stomach due to lack of exercise and
a steady diet of junk food (see Chips).
* HARDWARE - Tools, such as lawnmowers, rakes and other heavy equipment you haven't laid a
finger on since getting your computer.
* IBM - The kind of missile your family members and friends would like to drop on your
computer so you'll pay attention to them again.
* MENU - What you'll never see again after buying a computer because you'll be too poor to
eat in a restaurant.
* MONITOR - Often thought to be a word associated with computers, this word actually
refers to those obnoxious kids who always want to see your hall pass at school.
* PROGRAMS - Those things you used to look at on your television before you hooked your
computer up to it.
* RETURN - What lots of people do with their computers after only a week and a half.
* TERMINAL - A place where you can find buses, trains and really good deals on hot
computers.
* WINDOW - What you heave the computer out of after you accidentally erase a program that
took you three days to set up.
