Gates dies tragically (?) in a car
crash. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by St Peter. St Peter
says, "Well Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure where to send
you. After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every
home in the US, yet you also created that ghastly Windows 95. I'm going to do
something I've never done before. In your case, I'm going to let you decide whether you
want to go to Heaven or Hell. I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, if
it will help your decision."
"Okay then," said
Bill, "Let's try Hell first."
Hell turns out to be a beautiful, clean,
sandy beach with clear waters and lots of laughing, bikini-clad women running around,
frolicking in the water. The sun was shining; the temperature was perfect. Bill was
very pleased, "If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!"
"Fine," said St. Peter, and
off they went.
Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with
angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing
as Hell.
Bill thought for a minute, and rendered his
decision. "Hmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told St.
Peter. So Bill Gates went to Hell.
Two weeks later, St. Peter decided to
check on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he
found Bill, shackled to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves, being burned
and tortured by demons.
"How's everything going?"
he asked Bill.
Bill responded, his voice filled with
anguish and disappointment, "This is awful! This is nothing like the Hell
I visited two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to
that other place, with the beautiful beaches and the scantily-clad women playing in the
water?"
St. Peter replied, "What did you
expect, that was the DEMO."
