SIGNS
YOUR DOCTOR IS TOO OLD
- He brags about having delivered Strom
Thurmond.
- He leaves three times in the middle of
surgery to pee.
- He's always yelling at kids running
across his waiting room.
- Instead of hooking you up to an EKG, he
accidentally wires you up to a TV set showing "Murder She Wrote."
- He tells you about the latest in
anesthesia... and then hands you a bullet to bite on.
- He worked at Mt. Sinai... unfortunately
it was with Moses.
- Says he's skeptical about this new
penicillin drug.
- Says the tonsils will have to come out.
The only problem is... he's giving you a rectal exam.
- After installing a pacemaker, he says a
second heart operation will be needed to retrieve his missing teeth.
- After discovering he's out of colostomy
bags, he says, "Here, use mine."
- When he pulls out thermometer and says
"102"... he's talking about his age.
- You see him tapping that Knee Hammer on a
5 iron.
- Says he served as a medic during the
war... the Civil War.
- He was Eve's gynecologist.
- Hanging on his wall is a copy of the
Hippocratic Oath... signed by Hippocrates.
 
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