REASONS WHY ALCOHOL
SHOULD BE SERVED AT WORK...
* It's an incentive to show up.
* It reduces stress.
* Sitting on the copy machine will no
longer be seen as "gross."
* It leads to more honest communications.
* It reduces complaints about low pay.
* It cuts down on time off because you can
work with a hangover.
* Employees tell management what they
think, not what management wants to hear.
* It helps save on heating costs in the
winter.
* It encourages carpooling.
* Increase job satisfaction because if you
have a bad job, you don't care.
* It eliminates vacations because people
would rather come to work.
* It makes fellow employees look better.
* It makes the cafeteria food taste better.
* Bosses are more likely to hand out raises
when they are wasted.
* Salary negotiations are a lot more
profitable.
* Suddenly, burping during a meeting isn't
so embarrassing.
* Employees work later since there's no
longer a need to relax at the bar.
* It makes everyone more open with their
ideas.
* Everyone agrees the work is better after
they've had a couple of drinks.
* Eliminates the need for employees to get
drunk on their lunch break.
* Increases the chance of seeing your boss
naked. (?)
* It promotes foreign relations with the
former Soviet Union.
* The janitor's closet will finally have a
use.
* Employees no longer need coffee to sober
up.
* Babbling and mumbling incoherently will
be common language.
 
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