BAR ROOM
TRANSLATIONS
* "You get this one, next round is on
me." (We won't be here long enough to get another round.)
* "I'll get this one, next one is on
you." (Happy hour is about to end...drafts are now a dollar, but by the next round
they'll be $4.50 a pop.)
* "Hey, where is that friend of
yours?" (I have no interest in talking to you except as a way to get your attractive
friend into a compromising position.)
* "Can I get a glass of white
zinfandel." (female - I'm easy.)
* "Can I get a glass of white
zinfandel." (male - I'm gay.)
* "Ever try a body shot?" (male
to female - I am even willing to drink tequila if it means that I get to lick you.)
* "Ever try a body shot?" (female
to male - If this is how wild I am in the bar, imagine what I'll do to you on the ride
home?)
* "I don't feel well, let's go
home." (female - You are paying more attention to your friends than me.)
* "I don't feel well, let's go
home." (male - I'm horny.)
* "Who's got the next round?" (I
haven't bought a round in almost 3 years, but I am an expert at diverting attention.)
* "Excuse Me." (male to male -
Get the hell out of the way.)
* "Excuse Me." (male to female -
I am going to grope you now.)
* "Excuse Me." (female to male -
Don't even think about groping me, just get the hell out of the way!)
* "Excuse Me." (female to female
- Move your fat ass. Who do you think you are anyway? You are not all that, missy, and
don't think for one minute that you are. Coming in here dressing like a ho... Get your
eyes off of my man, or I'll slap you, bitch, like the slut you are.)
* "What do you have on tap?"
(What's cheap?)
* "Can I have a white Russian?"
(male - I'm *really* gay.)
* "Can I have a white Russian?"
(female - I'm *really* easy.)
* "That person looks really
familiar." (Did I sleep with him/her?)
* "Can I just get a glass of
water?" (female - I'm annoying, but cute enough to get away with this.)
* "I don't have my ID on me."
(female - I'm 19.)
* "I don't have my ID on me."
(male - I don't have a license since I got pulled over and blew a 1.4 after my last visit
here)
 
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