YOU'VE
HAD TOO MUCH HOLIDAY CHEER WHEN...
- You notice your tie sticking out of your
fly.
- Someone uses your tongue for a coaster.
- You start kissing the portraits on the
wall.
- You see your underwear hanging from the
chandelier.
- You have to hold on to the floor to keep
from sliding off.
- You strike a match and light your nose.
- You take off your shoes and wade in the
potato salad.
- You hear someone say, "Call a
priest!"
- You hear a duck quacking and it's you.
- You complain about the small bathroom
after emerging from the closet.
- You refill your glass from the fish bowl.
- You tell everyone you have to go home and
the party's at your place.
- You ask for another ice cube and put it
in your pocket.
- You yawn at the biggest bore in the room
and realize you're in front of the hall mirror.
- You pick up a roll, and butter your
watch.
- You suggest everyone stand and sing the
national budget.
- You're at the dinner table and you ask
the hostess to pass a bedpan.
- You take out your handkerchief and blow
your ear.
- You tell your best joke to the rubber
plant.
- You realize you're the only one under the
coffee table.
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