DEFINITIONS
OF A BACHELOR
One who avoids Bride-Eyed women.
One who believes in Life, Liberty and the
Happiness of Pursuit.
One who believes in Wine, Women and
So-Long.
One who believes that one can live as
cheaply as two.
One who can forget his mistakes.
One who can get into bed from either side.
One who can go fishing anytime, until he
gets hooked.
One who can have a girl on his knee without
having her on his hands.
One who can leave his socks and wallet
lying around the house.
One who can tell his symptoms to his Doctor
without having his wife interrupt.
One who can't be Spouse-Broken.
One who can't stand the strain of a wife.
One who cheated some woman out of a
divorce.
One who doesn't have to leave the party
when he starts having a good time.
One who failed to embrace his opportunities
One who is a free male.
One who is allergic to Wedding cakes.
One who is Foot-Loose and Family-Free.
One who is known as a Dame Dropper.
One who is not missing anything in life
except a few buttons on his shirt.
One who knows all the ankles.
One who knows how to hold a woman's hand so
that she doesn't get a grip on him.
One who knows if he has a steady girl on
the string he may wind up on a leash.
One who knows more about Women than Men.
That's why he is a Bachelor.
One who leans toward a woman but not far
enough to fall.
One who likes his Girl Friend just the way
she is...Single!!!!
One who looks, but does not leap.
One who never chases a woman he couldn't
outrun.
One who never knows whom the next kiss is
coming from.
One who never makes the same mistake once.
One who never met a girl he couldn't live
without.
One who never Mrs. Anything.
One who never says, "I'll Give You A
Ring Tomorrow!"
One who plays the game of love and manages
to retain his amateur outstanding.
One who prefers ripe tomatoes with little
dressing.
One who thinks he is a thing of Beauty and
a Boy forever.
One who travels fastest in a parked car.
One who tries to avoid the issue.
One who usually has his hands full trying
to loosen a woman's grip.
One who wakes up in the morning with all of
the blankets.
One who washes only one set of dishes.
One who when a girl asks him for a Diamond
Ring, he turns Stone-Deaf.
One who when he opens the window in his
apartment, more dust blows out than in.
One who won't take `Yes' for an answer.
One who would rather change girls than
change their names.
One who would rather cook his own goose.
One who would rather have a woman on his
mind than on his neck.
One who would rather mend his socks than
his ways.
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