PROTECTION
FOR MEN
Call 1-800-SAV-A-DIC!
"Woman chops off sleeping man's penis
and drops from moving car!" Don't laugh, it is true, and it can happen to you!! Right
now thousands of agitated, irate women have read that headline and are contemplating
similar action against you the next time you make an unwanted sexual advance, look at them
the wrong way, or just upset them in general!
MEN PROTECT YOURSELVES NOW!
If you found yourself a victim of CDS (Chop
and Drop Syndrome) could you be sure the appropriate authorities would find your chopped
member in time and intact? Could you be sure the penis part they found was yours?
Inquire now about our low-cost
PenisProtectionPlan! *
Plan 1: We'll register your penis and
scrotum, plus tattoo them with their own unique registration number, ensuring that in case
of separation, you will get a perfect match every time.
Plan 2: Our Jurassic prick program. We'll
take a cell sample from your penis and clone replacement parts for you in the event a
trailer-tractor runs over your penis, or some wild animal mistakes your detached member
for a chew toy.
Plan 3: For those of you who believe in
prevention, we offer a one size fits all, battery-operated, stainless steel jockstrap that
can be worn when necessary. When you are asleep an alarm will be activated when metal or
other hazardous objects come within one foot of the jockstrap. This will guarantee you a
full nights sleep, free of worry.
Don't get caught short...
Call 1-800-SAV-A-DIC today!!
Remember.... the dick you save could be
your own!!
* PRICES VARY ACCORDING TO SIZE.
|
