WHAT
DO WOMEN REALLY WANT?
Young King Arthur was ambushed and
imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but
was moved by Arthur's youthful happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he could
answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; if,
after a year, he still had no answer, he would be killed.
The question was: What do women really
want?
Such a question would perplex even the most
knowledgeable man, and, to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. Well, since it was
better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end.
He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everybody: the princess, the prostitutes, the
priests, the wise men, the court jester. In all, he spoke with everyone but no one could
give him a satisfactory answer.
What most people did tell him was to
consult the old witch, as only she would know the answer. The price would be high, since
the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.
The last day of the year arrived and Arthur
had no alternative but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer his question, but he'd
have to accept her price first: The old witch wanted to marry Gawain, the most noble of
the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend!
Young Arthur was horrified: she was
hunchbacked and awfully hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage water, often made
obscene noises. He had never run across such a repugnant creature. He refused to force his
friend to marry her and have to endure such a burden.
Gawain, upon learning of the proposal,
spoke with Arthur. He told him that nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to
Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table.
Hence, their wedding was proclaimed, and
the witch answered Arthur's question: What a woman really wants is to be able to be in
charge of her own life.
Everyone instantly knew that the witch had
uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it went. The
neighboring monarch spared Arthur's life and granted him total freedom.
What a wedding Gawain and the witch had!
Arthur was torn between relief and anguish. Gawain was proper as always, gentle and
courteous. The old witch put her worst manners on display. She ate with her hands, belched
and farted, and made everyone uncomfortable.
The wedding night approached: Gawain,
steeling himself for a horrific night, entered the bedroom. What a sight awaited! The most
beautiful woman he'd ever seen lay before him! Gawain was astounded and asked what had
happened. The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her (when she'd been a
witch), half the time she would be her horrible, deformed self, and the other half, she
would be her beautiful maiden self.
She asked him which would he want her to be
during the day and which during the night?
What a cruel question? Gawain began to
think of his predicament: During the day a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but
at night, in the privacy of his home, an old spooky witch? Or would he prefer having by
day a hideous witch, but by night a beautiful woman to enjoy many intimate moments?
What would you do? What Gawain chose
follows below, but don't read until you've made your own choice.
Noble Gawain replied that he would let her
choose for herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the
time, because he had respected her and had let her be in charge of her own life.
The Moral of the Story: It
doesn't matter if your woman is pretty or ugly, underneath it all, she's still a witch!
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