COMPARISONS
The following is from an actual 1950s Home
Economics textbook intended for High School girls, teaching them how to prepare for
married life:
1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the
night before, to have a delicious meal - on time. This is a way of letting him know that
you have been thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry
when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.
2. Prepare yourself: Take 15 minutes to
rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your
hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be a little
gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.
3. Clear away clutter. Make one last trip
through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school
books, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband will feel he
has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too.
4. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes
to wash the children's hands and faces if they are small, comb their hair, and if
necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them
playing the part.
5. Minimize the noise: At the time of his
arrival, eliminate all noise don't run the washer and dryer, or vacuum. Try to encourage
the children to be quiet.Greet him with a warm smile and be glad to see him.
6. Some DON'TS: Don't greet him with
problems or complaints. Don't complain if he's late for dinner. Count this as minor
compared with what he might have gone through that day.
7. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back
in a comfortable chair or suggest he lay down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink
ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soft,
soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and unwind.
8. Listen to him: You may have a dozen
things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.
9. Make the evening his: Never complain if
he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment; instead try to
understand his world of strain and pressure and his need to be home and relax.
10. The Goal: try to make your home a place
of peace and order where your husband can relax.
The Updated Version
for the 90's Woman:
1. Have dinner ready. Make reservations
ahead of time. If your day becomes too hectic just leave him a voice mail message
regarding where you'd like to eat and at what time. This lets him know that your day has
been crappy and give him an opportunity to change your mood.
2. Prepare yourself. A quick stop at the
"Clinique" counter on your way home will do wonders for your outlook and will
keep you from becoming irritated every time he opens his mouth. (Don't forget to use his
credit card!)
3. Clear away the clutter. Call the
housekeeper and tell her that any miscellaneous items left on the floor by the children
can be placed in the Goodwill box in the garage.
4. Prepare the children. Send the children
to their rooms to watch television or play Nintendo. After all, both of them are from his
previous marriage.
5. Minimize the noise: If you happen to be
home when he arrives, be in the bathroom with the door locked.
6. Some DON'TS: Don't greet him with
problems and complaints. Let him speak first, and then your complaints will get more
attention and remain fresh in his mind throughout dinner. Don't complain if he's late for
dinner, simply remind him that the leftovers are in the fridge and you left the dishes for
him to do.
7. Make him comfortable: Tell him where he
can find a blanket if he's cold. This will really show you care.
8. Listen to him: But don't ever let him
get the last word.
9. Make the evening his: Never complain if
he does not take you out to dinner or other places of entertainment; go with a friend or
go shopping (use his credit card). Familiarize him with the phrase "Girls' Night
Out!"
10. The Goal: Try to keep things amicable
without reminding him that he only thinks the world revolves around him. Obviously he's
wrong, it revolves around you!
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