WHAT HE HOPES/IS
AFRAID YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT SEX
Kissing/Light Petting
What he hopes you're thinking: "Oh, I
can't resist: I'm powerless before your seductive ways!"
What he's afraid you're thinking:
"Garlic breath--ewwww!"
Undressing
What he hopes you're thinking: "My
God, look at the size of that!"
What he's afraid you're thinking: "My
God, look at the size of that!"
Foreplay/Oral Sex
What he hopes you're thinking: "I
could worship at the alter of your impressive manhood for hours."
What he's afraid you're thinking: "If
he doesn't warn me before he comes, I'm going to kill him."
Penetration
What he hopes you're thinking: "You
stallion, you're splitting me in half!"
What he's afraid you're thinking: "Is
it in yet?"
Your Orgasm
What he hopes you're thinking: "Yes,
(his name here), yes!"
What he's afraid you're thinking: "I
deserve an Academy Award for this performance."
What he's even more afraid you're thinking:
"Yes, (other guy's name here), yes!"
Postcoital Bliss
What he hopes you're thinking: "Now I
know what an earthquake feels like."
What he's afraid you're thinking:
"Maybe I should let my lesbian friend Sue take me to that females-only dance club
after all."
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