Moses' account of the creation in the book
of Genesis is so familiar and so entrenched in our cultural heritage that many accept as
actual historic fact the assertion that Woman was created from one of Adam's ribs. Science
has railed against such simple beliefs for centuries. Last week, at a dig in the
escarpments along the western shore of the Dead Sea, archeologists have uncovered ancient,
original texts that pre-date Moses' writings by 1,300 years. Translated, their account of
life's beginnings on earth are much more scientifically plausible ...
"... and God created Woman, giving her
three breasts to succor her young. And God spake, saying to her, "I have created thee
as I see fit, but mine is no longer the only opinion in the universe (sigh). Is there
anything about thee that thou would prefer differently?"
And Woman spoke, saying, "Lord, I am
not made to birth whole litters; I do not need but two breasts."
And God said, "Thou speak wisely, as I
have created thee with wisdom."
There was a crack and a lingering odor of
ozone, and it was done, and Woman stood holding her third breast in her hand. "Now
just what am I gonna do with this useless boob?" Woman exclaimed.
