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ARTICHOKES

 

Arti was a real loser. Every job and every idea he ever had turned out wrong. He thought to himself, if I went into business for myself, maybe, just maybe I can do well. He thought and he thought, what could he do. It came to him, he would be a HIT MAN.

The next day he put a classified ad in the newspaper reading, "I am Arti, I will be your HIT MAN.  Give me a call and I will kill anyone you want rubbed out."

Well that very day Arti receives his first call. The caller asks if it were true that Arti would indeed kill anyone and Arti assured him that was the case.

The man told Arti he wanted his wife killed. Arti said, "Fine, but how much will you pay me?"

The man replied, "$1.00."

Arti said, "No way, bullets cost more than that."

The man replied, "Look, take it or leave it. Many people would kill my wife for free, but I don't want to be obligated."

Arti thought it over and figured he could use the practice so he said, "OK, tell me about your wife, how can I find her?"

The man said, "In the produce department at Food-Mart, every day at four o'clock she is there. She wears a yellow outfit and is always complaining about something."

Arti decides that he will go there and choke her. At least he will save himself the cost of bullets. Sure enough, she is in the produce department of Food-Mart complaining about the fruit being either too hard or too soft.

Arti reaches behind her and chokes her. As she fall to the floor, she makes a gasp. The manager of the produce department turns around and sees what has happened and calls out. Arti lunges at the manager and chokes him.

Just as the manager falls to the floor, a lady sees what has happened and screams out. Arti grabs her chokes her and runs out of the supermarket.

He is captured a block away. What does the headline of the newspaper read?

ARTI CHOKES THREE FOR A DOLLAR AT FOOD-MART!

 

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