YOU
MIGHT BE A BAD COOK IF...
1. The last time you tried to make toast
the kitchen caught on fire
2. Your apple pie bubbled over and ate the
enamel off the bottom of the oven.
3. You make tuna noodle broccoli surprise
for your roommate and the surprise is that it glows in the dark!
4. Your homemade bread can be used as a
door stop.
5. The leftover crumbs make a great
replacement for kitty litter.
6. Those annoying pest control companies
keep pestering you, wanting to buy and patent your recipe for candy Christmas cookies.
7. You forget and leave a gallon of your
homemade ice cream on the porch overnight during a record busting heat wave and the next
afternoon, not only is it still solid, but it tastes better.
8. You hate rice, but you keep finding it
floating around in your beef stew.
9. Your kids know what exactly peas
porridge in a crockpot nine days old tastes like.
10. The EPA requires that all your garbage
cans be marked with large bright red 'biohazard' symbols.
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