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ODE TO OLD AGE
Thought I'd let my doctor
check me,
'Cause I didn't feel quite right. . .
All those aches and pains annoyed me
And I couldn't sleep at night.
He could find no real
disorder
But he wouldn't let it rest.
What with Medicare and Blue Cross,
We would do a couple tests.
To the hospital he sent me
Though I didn't feel that bad.
He arranged for them to give me
Every test that could be had.
I was fluoroscoped and
cystoscoped,
My aging frame displayed.
Stripped, on an ice cold table,
While my gizzards were x-rayed.
I was checked for worms and
parasites,
For fungus and the crud,
While they pierced me with long needles
Taking samples of my blood.
Doctors came to check me
over,
Probed and pushed and poked around,
And to make sure I was living
They then wired me for sound.
They have finally concluded,
Their results have filled a page.
What I have will someday kill me;
My affliction is OLD AGE.
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