WHAT
IS AN AMERICAN?
We yell for the Government to balance the
budget, then take the last dime we have to make the down payment on a car.
We whip the enemy in battle, then give them
the shirt off our backs.
We yell for speed laws that will stop fast
driving, then won't buy a car if it can't go over 100 miles an hour.
Americans get scared to death if we vote a
billion dollars for education, then are unconcerned when we find out we are spending three
billion dollars a year for cigarettes.
We know the line-up of every baseball team
in the American and National Leagues but don't know half the words in the "Star
Spangled Banner."
We'll spend half a day looking for vitamin
pills to make us live longer, then drive 90 miles an hour on slick pavement to make up for
lost time.
We tie up our dog while letting our sixteen
year old son run wild.
We will work hard on a farm so we can move
into town where we can make more money so we can move back to the farm.
In the office we talk about baseball,
shopping or fishing, but when we are out at the game, the mall or on the lake, we talk
about business.
We are the only people in the world who
will pay $.50 to park our car while eating a $.25 sandwich.
We're the country that has more food to eat
than any other country in the world and more diets to keep us from eating it.
We run from morning to night trying to keep
our earning power up with our yearning power.
We're supposed to be the most civilized
Christian nation on earth, but we still can't deliver payrolls without an armored car.
We have more experts on marriage than any
other country in the world and still have more divorces.
 
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