CHANGES AT THE WHITE
HOUSE SINCE THE CLINTON'S GOT A PUPPY
*Accusations of crotch-sniffing at the
White House no longer automatically implicate the President.
*New "doggy door" makes it that
much easier to sneak out for a midnight run to McDonald's.
*At long last, Bill won't have to flinch
*every* time he hears "Bad boy."
*President no longer the only one accused
of burying his bone in someone else's yard.
*Even more silly photo opportunities for
the President on the White House lawn.
*New, unwelcome presents under the
Christmas tree.
*Obviously miffed Socks slips Kenneth Starr
a note reading "Bil luvs Monika!"
*Shouts of "Come!" from Lincoln
bedroom no longer make Hillary suspicious.
*Chelsea now has to share her room with
more popular sibling when she comes home from school.
*Pipe and slipper retrieval removed from Al
Gore's daily to-do list.
*Roger Clinton no longer is the only one to
piddle in the Rose Garden.
*Cries of "What a dog!" no longer
make Janet Reno burst into tears at State dinners.
*To the embarrassment of the trainers, dog
still unable to tell Al Gore from a tree.
*"Get that horny fur ball off my
leg!" no longer refers exclusively to the President.
 
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