SIGNS
YOUR COMPANY IS PLANNING A LAYOFF
- The CEO is frequently overheard mumbling,
"Eeny-Meeny-Miney-Moe."
- Dr. Kevorkian hired as "Transition
Consultant."
- Windows 98 shutdown screen reads,
"It's Now Safe to Start Looking for Work."
- Company softball team down-sized to chess
team.
- Sudden proliferation of teen-age geek
interns.
- Your boss keeps asking you when he can
"show your cubicle."
- Company president now driving a Yugo.
- Annual company holiday bash moved from
Sheraton banquet room to abandoned Fotomat booth.
- Old Milwaukee is beer of choice at
company picnics.
- Guard at front desk nervously fingers his
revolver whenever you pass by.
- Giant yard sale in front of corporate
headquarters.
- Babes in Marketing suddenly start
flirting with dorky personnel manager.
- Employee Discount Days discontinued at
Ammo Outlet.
- Company dental plan now consists of
pliers and string.
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