RULES
FOR DRIVING IN THE SOUTH
* A right lane construction closure is just
a game to see how many people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in
the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before hitting the
orange construction barrels.
* Turn signals will give away your next
move. A real Southerner never uses them.
* Under no circumstances should you leave a
safe distance between you and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by
somebody else putting you in an even more dangerous situation.
* Tailgating is a "must" to all
Southerners.
* Crossing two or more lanes in a single
lane-change is considered "going with the flow."
* The faster you drive through a red light,
the smaller the chance you have of getting hit.
If you MUST
use turn signals, here's how to do it, Southern Style.
* Signal only when you feel like it.
* If you feel you must use your
directionals, make sure they blink only once, then turn them off.
* Signal only after you change lanes.
* When driving straight, make sure that at
least one directional is blinking at all times. This keeps the drivers behind you on their
toes.
* Signal as you approach a curve in the
road.
* If you intend to make a right turn, use
the left signal.
* If you intend to make a left turn, use
the right signal.
* When approaching an intersection, signal
to turn and slow down. When other drivers or pedestrians cross in front of you, turn off
the signal and go straight.
* When you intend to make a turn, start
signaling approximately 6-8 blocks before your turn. Slow down for each block as you
approach them.
* Always apply your brakes way before you
signal.
* When making a left turn at a busy red
light, wait for the light to turn green before you turn on your signal.
* Wait until after you have started to turn
or change lanes to use your signals.
* If you must use hand signals instead of
your directionals, use your right hand or have your passenger do it out the right side
window.
 
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