IF
JESUS WERE A REDNECK...
* He'd have brought a fishing pole with him
when he walked on water.
* His last words on the cross would have
been, "Hey, Paul, I kin see my house from up here."
* He'd be famous for turning water into
beer.
* The prayer for the Passover meal would
have been, "Good food, good meat, good God, let's eat."
* His front yard would have been littered
with broken down mule carts.
* Instead of a grail, King Arthur would
been searching for the Holy Beer Mug.
* He would have cured blindness by yelling,
"Yer healed" and slapping them on the forehead.
* The disciples would have included Billy
Bob, Scooter, and Bubba.
* Sex, drinking, and dancing would clearly
have been declared not sinful.
* Instead of a fish, the symbol for Jesus
would be a fishing lure.
|