GOOD NEWS / BAD NEWS
FOR A PASTOR
Good News: You baptized
seven people today in the river.
Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current.
Good News: The Women's
Guild voted to send you a get-well card.
Bad News: The vote passed by 31-30.
Good News: The Elder Board
accepted your job description the way you wrote it.
Bad News: They were so inspired by it, they also formed a search
committee to find somebody capable of filling the position.
Good News: You finally
found a choir director who approaches things exactly the same way you do.
Bad News: The choir mutinied.
Good News: Mrs. Jones is
wild about your sermons.
Bad News: Mrs. Jones is also wild about the "Gong Show,"
"Beavis and Butthead" and "Texas Chain Saw Massacre."
Good News: Your women's
softball team finally won a game.
Bad News: They beat your men's softball team.
Good News: The trustees
finally voted to add more church parking.
Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of your parsonage.
Good News: Church
attendance rose dramatically the last three weeks.
Bad News: You were on vacation.
Good News: Your deacons
want to send you to the Holy Land.
Bad News: They are stalling until the next war.
Good News: Your biggest
critic just left your church.
Bad News: He has been appointed the Head Bishop of your denomination.
Good News: The youth in
your church come to your house for a surprise visit.
Bad News: It's in the middle of the night and they are armed with toilet
paper and shaving cream to "decorate" your house.
 
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