Father Joseph went up to Father Fred one
afternoon and said, "I am SICK of all this clean living. Tonight let's you and me go
out and party. We'll carouse, drink, whatever we want."
Fred was shocked. "Are you crazy? This
is a small town and everyone knows us. Besides, even if they didn't, they would see our
clothes and know we were priests."
Joe was ready for this. "Don't be
silly. We won't stay in town, we'll go into the city where nobody knows us, and we'll
dress just like anyone else."
In the end, he managed to persuade Fred,
and they went out that night and partied like professionals. When they got back home at
5:00 AM, Fred's face became pale. "I just thought of something," he said.
"We have to confess this."
Again, Joe was ready. "Relax, I told
you, I thought this all out in advance. Tomorrow, you go into church and into the
confessional. I will come in my regular clothes and confess, and you absolve me. Then I go
put on my garments, you come in and confess, and I'll absolve you."
Fred was amazed at Joe's brilliance. And
so, Joseph went in later that morning and said, "Father forgive me, for I have
sinned. My friend and I, we're both young men, and last night we went out and caroused. We
became drunk, had carnal knowledge of prostitutes, used foul language, danced to wicked
music."
Fred answered, "God is patient and
forgiving, and thus shall I be. Do 5 'Our Father's' and 5 'Hail Mary's' and you will be
absolved of your sin."
A while later, their places were reversed
as Fred came in and confessed everything in detail. There was a short pause, and Joseph
answered, "I don't believe this. And you DARE to call yourself a priest? You will do
500 "Our Father's," 500 "Hail Mary's," donate all your money for the
next month to the church, and go around the church 500 times on your knees praying for
God's forgiveness. Then come back and we'll discuss absolution, but I make no
guarantees."
"WHAT?!" Father Fred was shocked.
"What about our agreement??"
Joe replied, "Hey, what I do on my
time off is one thing, but I take my job seriously."
