One day, Pinocchio and his girlfriend were
in bed doing what girls and wooden boys do. Later, as they were cuddling, Pinocchio could
tell that something was bothering his girlfriend. So he asked her,
"What's the matter, baby?"
Pinocchio's girlfriend gave a big sigh and
replied, "You're probably the best guy I've ever met, but every time we make love,
you give me splinters."
This remark bothered Pinocchio a great
deal, so the next day he went to seek some advice form his creator, Gepetto. When
Pinocchio arrived, Gepetto could tell something was bothering Pinocchio, and asked him
what was the matter. As Pinocchio revealed his dilemma, Gepetto searched up and down
for a solution. Eventually, he suggested that sandpaper might be able to
"smooth" out Pinocchio's relationship with his girlfriend.
Pinocchio graciously thanked Gepetto and
went on his way.
Gepetto had not heard from Pinocchio for a
while and therefore assumed that the sandpaper had solved all of Pinocchio's problems.
A couple weeks later, Gepetto was in town
to have some blades sharpened at the hardware store when he ran into Pinocchio. When he
saw Pinocchio buying all the packs of sandpaper the store had in stock, Gepetto
remarked, "So Pinocchio, things must be going pretty damn good with the
girls."
To which Pinocchio replied,
"GIRLS? WHO NEED GIRLS???"
