Three Italian mothers were attending a
football game. Each had a son playing on the same team. At the start of the game, the
first boy saw his opportunity, grabbed the ball and running quickly, out-foxed the
opposing team, making the first touchdown. His mother, obviously proud of her son, sprang
from the bleachers, shouting in her broken Italian accent, "Thatsa *my* boy! I raised
him onna da Pet milk. Ain't he-a fine?"
Soon, the second boy received the ball and
in a spectacular run down the field, made another goal for the team. Not wanting to be
outdone by the first boy's mother, the second boy's mother jumped from her seat,
exclaiming, "Thatsa *my* boy!! I raised him onna da breast milk. Ain't he-a
wonderful?"
The third boy, hadn't done so well, but
finely someone threw him the ball. He fumbled it, then recovered...running in the wrong
direction, fell with the ball, ran some more, stumbled again, dropped it once more,
recovered it and finally crossed the goal line on the wrong end of the field. The third
Italian mother couldn't stand it any longer. Rising from her place in the stands, she
shouted, "Thatsa *my* boy! I raised him onna Milk of Magnesia. Ain't he-a the
shits?"
